I’d been battling with irrational fear for a few months. Along with that came frustration because I don’t like not knowing how to explain things. I was also dealing with disappointment.
How typical that I turn shamelessly to prayer.
Not for the first time, but for different reasons. I’d usually just give thanks (because I have a LOT to be grateful for) and only openly seek support when I got desperate. I realised the essence of seeking a continuous support system.
To cut a long story short:
1. I have regained confidence in a particular part of my life which had been troubling me for a long time. I am getting better. I am ease again. I am more at peace
2. I got my first car ^_^ (lol that made me happy)
3. In the space of two weeks, I’ve been left with 2 internship offers (that I’d been pursuing for a year), 2 work experience opportunities and 1 job interview (that I’d been pursuing for a year)
Gosh. I am so typical. Testifying when things go right but I couldn’t help it. I hate talking about details of my life. Not that many are interested in my life but I’d expect to pry and stalk to no avail if I were you lol.
Now, the reason I gave details in number 2 and 3. was to give a little clarity. I read this back to myself when I left both 1, 2 and 3 vague and thought “give a little detail, Hannah”. Keep in mind I did not pray for a car. Neither did I really pray for job opportunities. I just..well, prayed. I think God wanted to cheer me up as I was on a mini journey. Or He probably just knew those were important parts of my life.
Now, number 1, I am still dealing with what caused so much fear in me but am no longer filled with this fear. I’m SO grateful. “If this is truly what is meant to be right, just help me deal with it”.
I woke up one morning bursting with so much joy, I damn near cried. I was SO happy for NO good reason.
My hairdresser had a little chat with me. She told me to keep my heart, pure and open. She told me to ask and receive. 5 hours and a fresh set of box braids later, I’d been enlightened by the messages I pulled from her poor English. She’s amazing. She has testimonies for days. She’s so open, it’s inspiring. I want to be able to share like that one day.
Now, the morale of my story is:
I feel if I’d asked for a continuous support system, getting to where I am now wouldn’t have been filled with impatience, fear, confusion, frustration etc because I’d know I’d get through it.
I have my own relationship with my God and I’m sharing. Share what your God has done for you.
PS: I have wonderful parents.